“A woman I know well always treats her current romance as if it’s her first. She always looks like she’s never fallen in love with someone before that. That’s how it should be.”
– Kaiki Deshu
Photo Credit: http://agnes-cecile.deviantart.com/art/This-should-be-the-place-429674592
I often throw myself into terrible relationships because I want to believe that it will cultivate into something more. In the end I realize that I invested my time and efforts into nothing. The other party never wanted anything more. I then feel foolish and hopeless. I end up believing that there is no such thing as love. I tell myself that the idea was only fostered by films and delusional people and that “love” is only an exchange of services.
But. But I don’t want to believe that. I want to look at my failures and say, “This is not even the beginning. I deserve more. I deserve love.” It doesn’t have to be like the movies, and it can be an exchange of services, but I deserve someone who loves me. I won’t give up and when I do fall in love, it will be as if I never was hurt before. I will learn from my past and it will no longer be a burden.