Depression: So, I’m still struggling with “Post-Graduate Depression,” and I’m thinking that it may also have to deal with some other major events in my life. I’ll be checking with the doctor to see if I have major depression or dysthymia. I’ve noticed lately that I feel incredibly irritable with my family and I don’t want to spend anytime with them. I just want to be alone or to distract myself with other people.
Work/Career: I was able to secure a job with Noonan Family Swim School, so I’m glad that I will be able to busy myself with that and make money, so I can save to teach abroad. I’ve decided that I will be teaching in Thailand and go to school to earn a TEFL certificate. I haven’t put my deposit down yet, but I’m aiming for September 7th or September 28th.
Relationship: B, the guy I met online isn’t the most reliable person. After a few hiccups in our relationship, the little trust I had in him wanes everyday since. We went from being in a relationship to friends “with benefits,” but it seems like I get the crappy end all the time. I have to drive to his place, we only hang out when he wants, he sucks at replying to my messages, he is self-centered (he admitted this, which I do think is pretty cool of him to realize and acknowledge it, but I wish he had the desire to care for others as well) and some other unmentionables. But, the problem is, although I realize how crappy a partner he is, I am intrigued by him and I am attracted to him – I do want to be his friend. Most likely though I will end things between us. As of right now, I can’t handle that kind of relationship. I think if I was emotionally stable and loved myself, I probably could.
There is this other guy I met at a wedding – I’ll call him K. He’s pretty sweet. I don’t know much about him, but we’ll be meeting up this week to hang out. He does know about B, so he’s willing to just be friends. But, what I like about him – he is good at responding and actually has consideration for me. So, who knows what will happen!
Summer 2015 Bucket List:
- Six Flags
- Camp at Joshua Tree
- Road Trip to San Francisco
- Scary Movie Night and Pot Luck
- Skinny Dipping
- Volunteer: Hospice, Soup Kitchen, or Animal Shelter
- Take a yoga class or tai chi
- Get another ear piercing
- Go to Balboa Park
- Horseback riding
- Check out local festivals/ events
- Learn Amelie song on piano
- Edit soujourner’s wife (short story)
- Write short story
- Poetry Challenge
- Research Taoism – Tao Te Ching
- Urban explore – 1 house
- Get Emmy’s shots
- Go kayaking